Is there a way to monitor videos with EMBED code?
YouTube has JavaScript and Flash APIs that you can use to build your own player or programmatically control the player.
The documentation is here: http://code.google.com/apis/youtube/overview.html
There are several examples in the documentation for controlling your chromeless player. This is probably what you want to use if you want custom buttons.
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All major types of video players built into the browser have ways to do this, but this method is different for everyone.
YouTube uses a Flash player, which poses a particular problem: Flash video players do not have the ability to handle external JavaScript calls, other than what was specially added by the programmer who built the player. That is, unless YouTube has created its own player with external scripting support, you cannot script it. This is not a flag - on / off is what Flash allows you to publicly expose an external scripting API, and you have to know what the calls look like to get the player to do what you want. This is unlike, say, QuickTime, Windows Media Player, or the new HTML 5 <video> tag, all of which have the documentary basic playback control you are asking for.
Perhaps you can create your own FLV player (or buy one like the popular JW Player which has a JavaScript API) and point it to the actual video file served by YouTube. I don't know if they are trying to outshine the url of the video file, but once you know what it is, you are golden.
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